Before I became a filmmaker I was a writer, and writing is really what inspired me to go into the world of film and translate the stories in my head into tangible pieces of art. While I originally intended for this blog to be solely about my life as a filmmaker, I cannot ignore that my life as a writer heavily intertwines, especially since I would love to write my own scripts in the future.
It is November, which means it is National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo). I have been participating in this month’s writer-ly festivities since the age of 13 and I am in no way going to stop now, despite the fact that I am now in college and running on about -24% brainpower most of the time.
But instead of writing a novel this year, my goal is to go on a different kind of journey. I hope to produce a series of works including poems, essays, scripts, and short stories, dealing with a number of themes: anxiety, depression, failure, and relationships. This collection of works I have decided to call Confessions of a Serial Human Being. Call me a weird-ass writer if you want for that title, but I aspire that it will make sense at the end of this month.
Throughout the course of November I will be sharing pieces of my writing on this blog. Below is an introduction to this journey.
In his essay titled Essay on Criticism, Alexander Pope said, “to err is human.” In her book The Bell Jar, Sylvia Plath wrote, “I took a deep breath and listened to the old brag of my heart: I am, I am, I am.” In his novel End of the World Blues, Jon Courteney Grimwood said, “We die everyday […] it’s called being human.”
These are some of my favorite quotes about humanity. They are honest and simple and beautiful. They are also brutal, and hit you hard where it hurts. Because the most painful thing about being alive is being human. It is our greatest treasure and our ultimate flaw. There is not a single second of the day that our body takes a break – that our mind shuts down completely and we are allowed to float in a vacuum of nothingness. Being human is the ultimate 24/7/365 job.
And whether fortunately or unfortunately, we are bestowed it with no choice. Pray to God every night or curse him every night, there is nothing you can do to change the fact that you are the most complex, intelligent, mysterious thing in all of the endless universes.
With the body of work I aspire to produce this month I do not wish to try and uncover the “secrets” to existence. I simply want to dedicate time to look at what it’s like to be human; specifically a human with anxiety, depression, issues with failure, and complicated relationships.
Hopefully this won’t cause me too much of an existential crisis. I already have about 5 of those a day.
Wish me luck.